Aww crap!

Well, here I am again..not quite as long of a lag time as the last hiatus, but still a lag nevertheless. I am not back with great news to report, in fact, I am pretty frustrated after weighing today. Back at 249....aaarrgghh!!! So much for my great aspirations! I get so frustrated, because it feels like I will never get this weight off. Two steps forward and three back. I really am sick of the roller coaster. Some things are getting better. I am finished with my job at church now, which is actually a blessing in regained time. I am thankful to have that time back to spend with my family and regaining some sense of control in my life, by getting the house in better order, etc. Things are looking up in that area. Money is a challenge, in that I gave up a significant amount of income to regain that time. But, hopefully only a little over a year left to pay on debt, and life will level out financially. I really am looking forward to that! Money is a challenge as far as eating right is concerned too. It is expensive to eat healthy! Well, maybe not totally, but it definitely is cheaper to get things like fries, sugar, etc. So, I am looking at incorporating a lot more of one of my favorites: beans. I keep reading all sorts of wonderful things about beans. They are cheap too! I never met a bean I didn't like. Of course, I do enjoy them with rice and meats, but I am going to try, I think, to do more substituting beans as a main course. I am good with this, and I am thinking my kids may be okay with it too, as they aren't real into meat. Now the husband is a whole 'nother story though! He definitely feels the need for meat. I do on occasion, but I am thinking I could probably do like one meat day a week and be fine. If he doesn't have meat at each meal, he starts to get grumpier than usual! Will have to figure out how to work around that one. I am exercising, which is good....gotta get that part together at least!

Anyhow...I am not exactly sure what I am after, other than healthy eating, but I will try to formulate in my mind what we need to do and carry it out and blog back again. I know the Lord didn't design me to be obese...which means there is a way to get past this. Freedom, Lord....I pray for Your freedom, so that I can be the daughter of the King You designed me to be...Help me, Jesus!

Well, heck!

You can tell I have been off the wagon, as evidenced by my lack of blog posts! If I have nothing good to say about how I have been doing in the weight loss department, it makes me not want to write! But, alas, this is about accountability and honesty, so here I am, fessin up...AGAIN! I haven't been like out and out awful, but I haven't exactly been good either. I did get a treadmill a couple of weeks ago, which I am totally excited about. Have been trying to get to running again. I have been exercising, just not getting the eating under control. My quantities have been too big, South Beach went out the window after the boys' birthday (which was a month ago now) and I have been quite the dessert maker lately. My crockpot has been getting well-used, which is probably better than going out to eat all the time, but it hasn't exactly been crazy South-Beach-friendly fare coming out of it! So....that's where I am at. I need to get with it...again! Maybe I will check back in soon and have something good to say...maybe I can use this blog as motivation for that..maybe? Maybe! Ok...here's to blogging again sometime with something good to say before another month passes!

Off the wagon....gotta get back on!!!!

Well, what I feared would happen with making birthday cakes and birthday celebrations happened, and I have got to un-happen it, which I am really not good at. Not good at at all! I fell off the wagon...off the no-sugar, South Beach, feeling good about me wagon...Aaarrgh! All it takes is a big bear cake and a chocolate dinosaur, both slathered in more buttercream stars than you can shake a stick at, and I melt like the butter I stuck in my bra to thaw! Holy cow! Their birthday was Thursday, and so we went to eat that night and had Italian...Luigi's, of course, for my two little Mario fanatics. I ate a pasta dish, which wasn't SB friendly at all, and then had some birthday cake. Like, a lot of birthday cake. This particular one was from Randall's, and it was just the actual day-of-birth birthday cake. Yea, had so much of it that I spent a good part of Friday in the bathroom poopin blue from the icing colors. Nice, huh! So, Friday night I start making chocolate lollipops for party favors for the birthday party and bake the cakes that I spent Saturday decorating, and before I know it, I have cleaned up the bowl of melted chocolate before it ever made it to the sink, and yea...lots of buttercream was consumed that day. And the next, because of course it was there. And then had some cookies...and before I know it, here it is early Wednesday morning and I have hit the snack machine at work for a 3-pack of Zingers! What has become of me! OK.....so, I have fallen off...so, I haven't weighed for fear of what the scale will say. I can start fresh, right? Right? Yes, I must. We are still sorta willy nilly on the routine, since my girly hasn't started preschool yet, but I am gonna try to get in some bike trainer time this morning and jump into the exercise, which I dearly love. And, I have GOT to get the food thang back in line. So, I am thinking, starting....NOW....no sugar, unless its in fruit. None of that refined flour stuff either. Can I do it?? I hope I can, I hope I can!! Back on the wagon I go...and yea, for whatever reason, this reminds me of the video I have of my husband from many years ago when we took kids to Young Life camp, and he tried to get on the blob in the lake at camp. He jumped off the platform and kept sliding off into the water...over and over and over and over again...jump, slap, sploosh! I am hoping all my jump-slap-splooshing has been these past several days....lets hope this blob gets on the blob and STICKS with it this time!!!

What an amazing 7 years!

Well, today we celebrate a very special day at our home....my boys will be SEVEN years old!! This past 7 years has absolutely flown by, and it has been the greatest adventure I have ever been on. I am so thankful for each and every moment I have been able to spend with my precious boys. They are growing up so fast and are becoming such wonderful young men, right before my eyes! They can read now, are kind and considerate, love Jesus and their family, and I am beyond anything I can describe absolutely in love with these little guys. So, so thankful! Hoping I can make it a special day for them, despite being in between night shifts. I also don't have nearly as many gifts as I would like to have for them, so I am hoping tomorrow we can make everything happen that needs to come together!

I am also hoping to stay away from the sugar of the birthday cakes tomorrow and this weekend! It may be tough, but I think I am doing pretty well with my cravings. Weight is still holding pretty steady, so hopefully it will move a little more when I can start exercising more regularly.

Finished reading The Help tonight too...what an amazing book! I loved it, and can't wait now to see the movie! Anyhow....da,da,da,dat's all folks!!!!!

Still hangin!

Well, I am still behavin, still hangin in there! Nothing too exciting to report. Weighed in at 234 this morning, so slow and steady progress is good. I would love for it to be a little faster, but as long as its moving in the right direction, I'm not gonna complain! Today was an "awake" day for me home with just me and the kiddos, and it was awesome. I love days like today. Even got a few things done...there is a TON more that needs to get done, and I barely scratched the surface, but at least it's something!

Holdin on

So, weighed in this afternoon at 235.5...holding steady. That means I neither gained nor lost over the weekend, and I am back on track now, so yay for me! Last night and this morning were pretty uneventful. Went and bought some groceries...lots of lean meats, grapes, sugar free pudding..you know, the good stuff! So, I'm back with it..hoping to stay that way! Slept a couple of hours before my husband put the dogs in to cool off, thinking they would calm down and go to sleep in my room, but I woke up to barking and chewing, only to find out that my chacos were chewed up....I couldn't sleep then, so I got up and sewed my sandals back together the best that I could, and now I think I am about to order some new chacs...my old ones were nearing replacement anyway, so this just sped up the process, I guess. Anyhow, then I managed about an hour nap before I got up, got to cooking, read 2 chapters of Hank the Cowdog to the kiddos, showered, ate, and had to head into work. So...there ya go! Holding on is good!

Back from the Vacay!

Well, we had a most wonderful amazing few days of family time on our little vacation this past weekend! So blessed and so thankful! I worked til 5:30 a.m. on Friday, and we finished packing and cleaning house that morning before heading out on the road. I ended up sleeping only about a half hour, but really enjoyed the time on the ride even though I was sorta sleepy. We drove to San Antonio (well, actually, Boerne) and went to Bass Pro Shop (gotta complete the tour of as many locations as possible!) and then checked into our hotel. Then, we headed up the road about an hour to Mo Ranch, a beautiful camp property where we send our church kids to for conference. I had seen it, but not actually seen it-seen it, as I have only dropped kids off there. My kids had been wanting to see it ever since their daddy went last summer with our youth, so this was a great chance to visit. Let me say: I was super impressed! I knew it would be cool, but had no idea just how cool! Beautiful views, and just an amazing quality of stepping back in time--in a good way, not an outdated sort of way. It is the sort of place I want to and intend to take my family to, hopefully many times between now and when they are grown. I want my boys and my girl to be able to have some memories at this place. So cool! So, then, we went back to our hotel (after dinner with my husband's brother and nephew, more on that in a sec) and Saturday we went to Fiesta Texas...didn't intend to stay all day, but we did! It was GREAT! My kids had a ball, and it was so much fun watching them enjoy every second of what we did! We played at the waterpark and rode tons of rides, saw the laser and fireworks show at the end of the night, the whole bit. I think we made some sweet memories, and I am so thankful! Then, Sunday, we were intending to go to church somewhere locally, but were really tired, and the kids hadn't been able to swim at the hotel pool at all, so we decided to have church on our own that morning and let the kids swim a little while before we left. They really enjoyed it, and we had a devotion time and singalong in the van on the way to my parents house in Burnet. We had the most wonderful evening with my mom and dad.....so nice! And this morning we had to take off and head back home...but we took the scenic route..the very scenic route, as a matter of fact! We went to Inks Lake State Park to check out the campsites, and were very glad that we didn't camp this weekend like we had planned! The Lord had other plans for our weekend, and it turned out far better than we could have ever asked for. We drove around there, then headed back a different way than we usually go, to do some checking out of the Bulverde/Canyon Lake/New Braunfels area, where we hope to move in the next year or two, Lord willing. We also checked out Guadalupe River State Park, which is another on our list of possibilities for camping, and then we ate lunch at the Gristmill in Gruene. What a treat! To look out at the river while we ate yummy food!!! Speaking of which....how did I do on the eating while I was gone, you ask? (well, I guess I ask, since I am my only reader, that I know of!) I wasn't perfect, but I wasn't too bad either! Friday, I had a McDonald's salad for lunch...went with the fried chicken on it, which was a little of a stretch, but could have been much worse! That night, we ate at a place in Kerrville called Culver's, with Craig's brother and nephew (their pick). It was basicallly a burger joint, and I am pretty sure there wasn't much on the menu that was healthy. I did opt for a grilled chicken salad and got a side of sweet potato fries, which I am sure aren't as healthy as what I make, but I could have been WAY worse...then, they had this frozen custard ice creamy stuff and it was BAD tempting, so my husband and I got a kiddie size one and split it...so yea, I was proud of that effort! The next day at the hotel, breakfast options were a little dismal...waffles, breakfast "corndogs", fully sugared up instant oatmeal, muffins, you know, that sort of thing...unless you opted for the hard boiled eggs, which I did not--legal, but yuck! So, I did the best I could with a packet of oatmeal and an English muffin, knowing we had Fiesta Texas ahead of us. We got lunch to take at Subway, and I got a 6-inch Club...had some baked chips with it, which isn't great, but I could have gone for the footlong and regular chips, so relatively speaking, I didn't do too bad...Now, that night I was a little bad...but just a little. We went to Habaneros, which is a Freebird's-esque build-your-burrito-as-you-go type place. I got a burrito with some rice (a no-no) but I did have a wheat tortilla, beans, and steak, which were very yummy and okay! Of course, the chips for the salsa weren't so great, but I didn't have a ton of them. Sunday morning breakfast at the hotel was the same bleh offerings as the day before....but they did have what appeared to be a wheat bagel, so I opted for that. Probably way bigger than I should have had, but it was brown at least! Then at lunch we stopped in Blanco on the way to my parents and got gas and lunch at the Stripes station and store thingy. I was a good girl and opted for the grilled chicken salad they had in their cooler. Then was when I got a little bad later....tacos al carbon (3 on flour tortillas..oh, the shame!), refried beans (they had no charro option) and rice and more chips than I should have even thought about, out to eat Mexican food. Sure was good though! This morning, I didn't do a lot better, with 2 of these out-of-this-world biscuits my mom had, plus a donut hole, plus a little piece of the chocolate pie she made. But, I think had I not had any of that bad stuff, I'd have felt deprived. And I didn't go nutso or anything...just HAVE to get right back...which I sorta did at lunch..well, sorta. We ate at the Gristmill, an amazing place I havne't been to since I was a kid, in Gruene. I got the grilled tomatillo chicken breast with some pinto beans and it was AMAZING!!!! Then though, the bad part was the dessert...although we split it 5 ways, It was an awful lot of brownie, ice cream and deliciousness! But, we are back, and it's back to it..and I am good with that. I feel like my little cheats this weekend were minimal, and that they will help keep me on track. Moderation...Stacy REALLY needs to learn moderation!

Overall, this weekend was just the biggest blessing. I feel like it was a great ending to a great, but way too fast summer. Loved my time with my family, and I feel like we made some great memories and I cherish times like that. God IS good....ALL the time!!!